The rib ticklers used below are used with permission from the author Ralph Milton.

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Rib Tickler 6

A holiday wish for us all:
            May your stuffing be tasty
                        And your turkey plump,
            May your lovely brown gravy
                        Have never a lump.
            May your spuds be delicious
And your pies take the prize,
            And may your nice Christmas dinner
                        Stay off your thighs!

Rib Tickler 7

The church school teacher had been talking about how Jesus can come and live in our hearts. One five-year-old must have been thinking about this on the way home in the car with her Dad. She leaned over and put her head on his chest.
            "What are you doing?" he asked.
            "I'm listening for Jesus in your heart?" she said.
            "And what do you hear?" her Dad asked.
            "It sounds like Jesus is making coffee."

Rib Tickler 8

A Sunday school teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?"
            A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked.
            "You know: 'Our Father, who does art in Heaven ...'"

Rib Tickler 9

The two elderly people are sitting on the front porch and rocking away.
            "I hope I die pretty soon," said one.
            "Why?" asked the other.
            "Because I'm getting so old, all my friends in heaven will think I didn't make it!"

Rib Tickler 10

The minister was serving a downtown congregation, and was somewhat used to the assortment of people that came in to see her for one reason or another.
            And so it was that a man comes in one day and says, "Reverend. The joints of my body are talking."
            The minister swallows hard and asks, "All your joints?"
            "No," says the man. "Just my leg. Put your ear close to my hip and listen."
Sure enough. The hip was talking. "Hey, do you have $20?  I have no money.  I just need 20 bucks to tie me over.  Please?  I have no money!"
            The minister stands up. She can't believe what she has just heard.
            "That's not all," says the man. "Put your dear ear near my knee."
            The minister does, and sure enough she hears the knee saying, "Hey, do you have 10 bucks?  I have no money and I need a meal.  Do you have 10 bucks?"
            The minister is speechless. The man says, "That's not all.  Put your ear by my ankle."
Sure enough. The ankle starts in, "I have no money.  I just need a cup of coffee.  Come on, don't you have 5 bucks you can give me?  I have no money ... nothing!  Come on, help me out!"
Suddenly the light dawns. The minister stands up and smiles. "I know what the problem is," she says. "Your leg is broke in three places!"